These “misfortune cookies” aren’t inspiring, but they’re pretty funny (2024)
P. Claire Dodson
Updated
If you’ve ever opened a fortune cookie to find something either incredibly cheesy or incredibly irrelevant and just rolled your eyes, these new “misfortune cookies” produced by German company Pechkeks are for you.
The updated cookies are black (like your soul) and feature disappointing outlooks for your future endeavors. The product description on Amazon reads, “These cookies may be deliciously crunchy, but they’re also tough to swallow — because you can be sure that they won’t predict eternal love or unimaginable wealth. Quite the opposite. They can be really nasty, brutally honest, truthful and direct, crude or pessimistic.” That sounds about right.
That descriptor doesn’t lie. Some sample fortunes read, “When you think it can’t get any worse, wait a moment and it will.” “Life is a symphony – and you’re playing the kazoo.” “At least I believe in you. Me, a piece of paper.” “Things will get better. Sometimes. Maybe.”
And possibly the most realistic fortune, “All your wishes will come true. Just not in this life.”
The cookies have been making people in Europe and Australia wary of the future since 2013 and soon they’ll be coming to stores in the U.S. and Canada. You can also buy them off Amazon, but they’re currently sold out. The company told Confectionary News that the cookies are for those who “start talking about skin cancer as soon as the first ray of spring sunshine peeks through the black clouds.”
Now these #misfortunecookies are just what I need. They're sarcastic and delicious!
And don’t worry, they still taste like your normal fortune cookies, even though they’ve been carbon-dyed. The company only sources local ingredients, and restocks every two months so the cookies stay fresh. There are also more than 1,000 different options. We can’t wait to find out which misfortune awaits us after our lo-mein.
Some sample fortunes read, “When you think it can't get any worse, wait a moment and it will.” “Life is a symphony – and you're playing the kazoo.” “At least I believe in you. Me, a piece of paper.” “Things will get better. Sometimes. Maybe.”
There are many superstitions when it comes to eating fortune cookies. Some people claim that you must eat the whole cookie in order for the fortune to come true or, if the fortune is ill fated, that you cannot eat any of the cookie or the bad fortune will come true.
An empty fortune cookie may be disappointing, but what it means isn't. There are two popular beliefs about what an empty fortune cookie means but don't worry, both are good. The first is that you will soon have something good happen to you.
A cookie script, also known as a JavaScript cookie, is a snippet of code embedded in a website that handles cookies. It is typically written in JavaScript and executed by the user's browser.
The concept of message-stuffed pastry has supposedly endured through ages. Perhaps the most plausible story dates back to 1918 when, in Los Angeles, David Jung, founder of the Hong Kong Noodle Co., invented the fortune cookie as a sweet treat and encouraging word for unemployed men who gathered on the streets.
Regardless of their true origin, it's clear that the popularity of fortune cookies has soared, becoming a staple end to meals in Chinese restaurants across the Western world. The cookies themselves have become a symbol of good luck and future prosperity, embraced by many cultures around the globe.
He is best known for his voracious appetite and his famous eating catchphrases, such as "Me want cookie!" As his name suggests, his preferred food is cookies; though he eats almost anything, including inedible objects.
Soon her eye fell on a little glass box that was lying under the table: she opened it, and found in it a very small cake, on which the words “EAT ME” were beautifully marked in currants.
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